Short Description
Her name was Khawlah bint Tha'labah Ibn Asram Ibn Auf. She was the wife of Anas Ibn as-Sâmit who fought in the battle of Badr, Uhud and all other battles in which the Prophet (pbuh) fought.
Name & Family
Her name was Khawlah bint Tha'labah Ibn Asram Ibn Auf. She was the wife of Anas Ibn as-Sâmit who fought in the battle of Badr, Uhud and all other battles in which the Prophet (pbuh) fought.
Allah answers her complaint
The story of Khawla bint Tha'labah and her husband Aws Ibn al-Sâmit is narrated by Imam Ahmad and Abu Dawud and quoted by Ibn Kathir in his tafsir at the beginning of Surat al-Mujadilah.
Narrating her story, Khawlah said:
"By Allah, concerning me and Aws Ibn al-Samit, Allah revealed the beginning of Surat al-Mujadilah. I was married to him, and he was an old man who was bad-tempered. One day, he came in and I raised a particular issue with him again. He became angry and said, 'You are to me as the back of my mother.' Then he went out and sat for a while in the meeting-place of his people. Then he came back, and wanted to resume marital relations with me. I said, 'No way! By the One in Whose hand is the soul of Khawla, you will never get what you want from me after saying what you said, until Allah and His Messenger (peace be upon him) decide between us.' He tried to force himself on me, but I was able to resist because I was a young woman and he was a weak old man. I pushed him away. Then I went to one of my (female) neighbors and borrowed a cloak from her and went to the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him). I sat before him, told him what my husband had done to me, and began to complain to him about my sufferings because of my husband's bad temper. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, 'O Khawlah, your cousin (i.e. your husband) is an old man, so fear Allah with regard to him.' I did not leave him until Qur'an was revealed concerning me. He was overcome as he usually was when Qur'an was revealed to him, and when it was over, he said: 'O Khawlah, Allah has revealed Qur'an concerning you and your husband.' Then he recited to me:
{Certainly has Allah heard the speech of the one who argues [i.e., pleads] with you, [O Prophet Muhammad], concerning her husband and directs her complaint to Allah. And Allah hears your dialogue; indeed, Allah is Hearing and Seeing. Those who pronounce zihâr (i.e. the saying by a husband to his wife, "You are to me like the back of my mother," meaning unlawful to approach. This was a type of divorce practiced by the Arabs before the prophethood of Muhammad) among you [to separate] from their wives – they are not [consequently] their mothers. Their mothers are none but those who gave birth to them. And indeed, they are saying an objectionable statement and a falsehood. But indeed, Allah is Pardoning and Forgiving. And those who pronounce zihâr from their wives and then [wish to] go back on what they said – then [there must be] the freeing of a slave before they touch one another. That is what you are admonished thereby; and Allah is Acquainted with what you do. And he who does not find [a slave] – then a fast for two months consecutively before they touch one another; and he who is unable – then the feeding of sixty poor persons. That is for you to believe [completely] in Allah and His Messenger; and those are the limits [set by] Allah. And for the disbelievers is a painful punishment. } [al-Mujâdilah: 1-4]
The Prophet told me, 'Let him release a slave.' I said, 'O Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him), he does not have the means to do that.' He said, 'Then let him fast for two consecutive months.' I said, 'By Allah, he is an old man, he is not able to do that.' He said, 'Then let him feed sixty poor people with a wasq of dates.' I said, 'O Messenger of Allah, he does not have that much.' He said, 'Then we will help him with a faraq of dates.' I said, 'And I will help him with another faraq, O Messenger of Allah.' He said, 'You have done right and done well. Go and give it in charity on his behalf, then take care of your cousin properly.' And I did so."
High Status
It comes as no surprise that this great woman enjoyed such high standing among the companions who were her contemporaries and knew her virtues, above all 'Umar Ibn al-Khattâb. She met him one day outside the mosque, when al-Jârud al-'Abdi was with him. 'Umar, who was the caliph at that time, greeted her, and she said to him, "O 'Umar, I remember you when you were called 'Umayr (little `Umar) in the marketplace of 'Ukaz, taking care of the sheep with your stick. So fear Allah in your role as caliph taking care of the people, and know that the one who fears the threat of punishment in the Hereafter realizes that it is not far away, and the one who fears death fears missing some opportunity in this life." Al-Jarud said, "You have spoken too harshly to the Emir of the Believers, woman!" 'Umar said, "Let her be. Do you not know that this is Khawlah, to whose words Allah listened from above the seven heavens? By Allah, 'Umar should by rights listen to her."
Ibn Kathir mentions in his tafsir that a man said to 'Umar, when he saw him welcoming her warmly and listening to her, "You left a man of Quraish and came to listen to this old woman?" 'Umar said, "Woe to you! Do you not know who this is?" The man said, "No." 'Umar said, "This is a woman whose complaint Allah listened to from above the seven heavens: this is Khawla bint Tha'labah. By Allah , if she did not leave me until night fell, I would not tell her to leave until she had got what she came for, unless the time for prayer came, in which case I would pray, and then come back to her until she had got what she came for."
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